In 2006, a (then) twelve-year-old boy made headlines when he stuck a gooey glob of Wrigley’s Extra Polar Ice on Helen Frankenthaler’s The Bay, which the Detroit Institute of Arts valued at $1.5 million. The gum left a stain. The Bay, ironically, looks like a polar blue stain, too.
I like to imagine the boy still holds the record of “Coolest Kid Ever,” much to the chagrin of his embarrassed square-as-hell parents. He is most likely about 21-years-old now, so to all the bartenders reading this, drinks are on YOU.
The priceless masterpiece was successfully cleaned and restored, but the damage was done. Nothing afterwards could stop our rampant imaginations from defacing other DIA works, with something much meatier than gum. Coneys.
1. Old Man Relives High School Glory When He Catches The Coney At The Demon’s Endzone
2. Sacrificing One For The Team
3. Sacrificing A Coney To The Rain Gods
4. Jesus Multiplies Coneys
5. Three Women See The Same Mirage
6. Van Gogh Was Starving For A Coney
7. Everyone Surprised To Find A Coney When Man Opens Grandson’s Diaper
8. Under The Magic Coney Tree
DIA offers free admission for residents of Macomb, Oakland and Wayne county. For more information about the DIA, visit their website and Facebook.